Monday, February 4, 2008

Perhaps because I know we’ll be seeing the neurologist soon, I have been writing a letter to him in my head. I wanted to write it down for two reasons. One: I can’t seem to get it out of my head and it is cathartic to write it down. Two: I’d never send it to him or say these things to him, but perhaps writing it down will give me more strength and confidence when we do see him. Anyway, here it is…

Dr. Gloom,
Please don’t tell us you’re sorry. Why would you be sorry? Our son is alive, he’s beautiful and we’re so blessed to have him our lives. We’re not sorry about that.

Don’t patronize us. Don’t look at our child like he’ll never amount to anything. Most of all, don’t limit his possibilities. Don’t tell us he won’t be able to do this or that. He can be anything he wants to be. He could be a neurologist someday as far as I’m concerned. That isn’t the profession I would choose for him, but I’m not going to limit his options in life.

Please be straightforward. Don’t coat your words in sugar, but don’t paint pictures of the worst case scenario either. We’ll deal with things as they come and we don’t need to be worried about what may or may not occur. Tell us what you see, but don’t be so dramatic about it.

Look at our miracle. For once, notice the positive things about him. Recognize how far he has come and realize how far he can go with God’s help. Look at the boy in front of you and smile. See how amazing he is and then I dare you to tell us how sorry you are.

I’m starting to feel apprehensive about our “appointment month” as you may have gathered. I don’t want to go to all of those specialists, but I know that we need to for Elijah. We want the best for him, of course, and we’ll do whatever is necessary to give him the best chances in this life.

This week the only appointment we have is Early Intervention. They are coming tomorrow afternoon. I always look forward to their visits and starting tomorrow, they’ll be coming once a week. It’ll be nice to see them more often and it will only help in Elijah’s development. Next week Wednesday is when the appointments start…he’ll be seeing the Pediatric Optometrist and the Neurologist. As always, I’ll keep you posted. Oh, and if you’re wondering, we had fun at the SuperBowl party. Elijah even watched part of the game on the big screen. I suppose the little stinker is going to want one of those now. :)

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